I have a confession to make. I’m also sexist.
My 10-year-old daughter was so excited the other day about being asked by her teacher to help a six-year-old girl to read.
“She’s so smart mommy,” she said, about the little girl named Simaya.
“Then why did they want you to help her read?,” I asked.
“She just needs some help pronouncing the big words,” she said with such pride in her voice and a huge grin on her face.
My first reaction was to think to myself : “You’re not going to become a teacher are you?”
I share this story with a huge degree of embarrassment in and disgust for myself. I think the job of teacher is truly the most important one in our society, but my first reaction to my daughter’s joy of teaching was “ugh”.
There’s a reason I can point to as contributing, at least a bit, to this reaction. I spent last week researching a story about how young women are increasingly choosing not to go into the sciences and technology. (You can view my column here.) And I even got to interview Sally Ride, the first American women in space, for the piece.
I asked her how she was able to pursue a career in science and excel in it despite a society that tries to derail girls from going into the STEM (science, technology, engineering, math) professions, and she said:
“There was nothing different about me. There was probably something different in my circumstances. I was interested in science, like a lot of girls, but I was lucky that I didn’t run into that person that said ‘science isn’t for girls.’ I got through high school and college not knowing science wasn’t for girls.”
Ride’s hope is that we get the word out to parents and educators that this is “a normal thing for girls to be interested in.”
It got me on the get-girls-involved-in-tech/science band wagon, but I needed a reality-check bitch slap. I got that from my daughter.
We do our whole society a disservice if we allow our zeal to get more women involved in STEM fields to undermine the important jobs that have little to do with the space program, or cell phone technology.
By not seeing the value in professions where women dominate, i.e. education, nursing, etc., I’m just as bad as all the others out there who think girls can’t do what ever they put their minds to.
Teachers still can’t get the recognition they deserve. The pay is low compared to so many other professions, and now layoffs loom on a large scale nationally because of the economy.
Many teachers and educators across the United States are at risk of losing their jobs in the next few months, the nation’s education secretary told a meeting of the National Governors Association on Sunday.
We need a public outcry to make sure we don’t lose even one teacher. Maybe some of the big banker bonuses, possible because of a tax payer bailout, should be given back to states so they can keep paying teachers.
It seems it’s always open season on teachers. A Wall Street Journal oped piece today takes a shot at tenure among public school teachers, saying it leads to bad schools. It’s time the WSJ’s editorial team starts squawking about tenured corporate executives who get the big bucks even though they do little for shareholders and their employees.
I think it’s easy to bash teachers because most teachers are women. Clearly, we have a long way to go before we think of women as equal citizens of the world. Women themselves don’t give women the props they deserve.
I’m even guilty of this.
I don’t know what my daughter will become. I know she loves teaching, and I know she loves discovering incredible things about the earth.
But in the end, I’m just as bad as those parents who discourage their daughters from entering male dominated fields.
I’m sorry Ms. Burke. That was my high school social studies teacher who made me realize I was just as good as the boys.
What do you want your daughter to be when she grows up? Not that you have any control over that.
(FYI: Last year I spoke about girls and tech to a group of high school girls at a school near my home. It was an event that launched a new IT curriculum for the school, Padua Academy’s Cisco Network Academy. Here’s a link to some of their stories.)
February 22nd, 2010 at 11:08 am
You asked, “What do you want your daughter to be when she grows up?” The short answer is “happy,” but we don’t have control of that either.
Honestly, for both my sons and daughters, I hope they will grow up and establish families. I’m far less concerned with what line of work they choose, or which economic bracket they find comfortable. Whether they become single- or dual-earner families will largely be up to them, and will be, in part, dictated by the circumstances they encounter in life.
My eldest daughter has always enjoyed cooking (she was experimenting with different recipies from her first days making anything!), and she wants to be a chef. That’s wonderful, but I’ve had to remind her that, unless she plans only ever to be a chef in somoene else’s employ, she should also make sure her math, language, and business skills are honed, too. Otherwise, her dream of having her own restaurant may be much more difficult to attain. She’ll have my support in pursuing that dream.
One of my other daughters has no interest in a career outside of the home. She’s only interested in starting a family and rearing children. While it is not a popular choice in this day and age, I’ll support her in that pursuit just as much as I’ll support my other daughter (and all my other children).
February 22nd, 2010 at 11:38 am
I considered science as a profession and my mother (a teacher) asked, “Are you really interested in science?” I don’t think she would have asked that if I were male. If I ever have a daughter, I’ll encourage her to go into a career that interests her and to be open to male dominated fields. I think we have to offset the perception that girls can’t be really good at math or science.
February 22nd, 2010 at 11:49 am
You are so right HikingStick, my first desire for my daughter would be to be happy.
I know family is so important, but not everyone can find their soul mate and have children. Just as not everyone can find the career they’ll be happy in.
It’s all a crap shoot, no?
And Andrea, you story about your mother made me think of something Sally Ride, the first American female in space, told me last week.
I asked her how she was able to pursue a career in science and excel in it despite a society that tries to derail girls from going into the STEM professions, and she said:
“There was nothing different about me. There was probably something different in my circumstances. I was interested in science, like a lot of girls, but I was lucky that I didn’t run into that person that said ‘science isn’t for girls.’ I got through high school and college not knowing science wasn’t for girls.”
Ride’s hope is that we get the word out to parents and educators that this is “a normal thing for girls to be interested in.”
Amen Sista!!
February 22nd, 2010 at 11:52 am
great article. When I was in nursing school in the 90s, I got to hear, over and over again, “why aren’t you in medical school?”- none of the smarter and frankly more competent girls in my class were ever asked that! But then again, nursing is a *vocation* that you do because you *love it- just like teaching, you’re not *doing it for the money, are you? and hey-presto, if you act like you need more $$s, you get vilified….
February 25th, 2010 at 11:43 am
Very good article! I have a 14 year old daughter, so you and I are approximately in the same age group. Our generation was among the first to realize we weren’t limited by gender in our choice of careers. It’s difficult not to encourage our daughters to choose a career that is not so traditional. When I was choosing a career myself my goal was to pick something that not a lot of women did — I chose marketing and advertising. After about a year I discovered that it wasn’t for me and went to school to get a master’s degree in library science. I discovered a wanted to be a librarian of all things! How much more traditional could I have gotten? The career has since morphed into a writing career, more based on circumstance than on vocation but I loved being a librarian. Fortunately I love being a writer too. It’s all about choices and realizing how fortunate we are to have so many.
February 25th, 2010 at 11:59 am
My early career in computers was among a 50/50 mix of genders. Why? My opinion was that it was a new field with no pre-conceived notions. If you had an intelligent and logical mind, you did well. At one point, my management for four levels were all highly compentent women. My mental response was, “Well, that takes care of any sexism I might have had.”
My wish for my kids was that they be in the right job for them at the right time, loving what they do. To help with their decisions, we encouraged them to intern in those fields to see if they like it. Whether they did or not, it’s better to find out before spending years of study. The end result is that the daughter graduated from the same medical school as her gradnfather and took over his family practice. And, the son, after several years in manufacturing and food industry, returned to graduate from college and hopefully will become the third generation to run our small business.
February 25th, 2010 at 12:07 pm
Since I’m on a roll this morning, I must disagree with Eve regarding teachers needing protection. Or any government workers. We are in the middle of a recession folks. We have suffered the loss of millions of jobs due to reduced revenue streams for businesses. The same thing is happening to goverment at the federal, state, and local levels. Yet, government jobs have not only been protected, government jobs are a growth industry. Particluarly at the federal level.
Of course, the educators cry about teacher losses. that’s because they are trying to protect their own adminstration jobs. Businesses have cut out layers of managers to become more efficient and effective. It’s time for education and all government to do the same. Sure, some underperforming schools will be closed. And, underperforming teachers let go. Should have happened a long time ago.
It’s time to end the mentality that “government jobs are good jobs and must be protected.”
February 25th, 2010 at 1:02 pm
WHOA!!! Where is all of this coming from? I don’t even know where to begin. First of all, never in my entire life was I told not to enter the sciences. In fact, I was always encouraged to go into science and because of my own mind, I ended up in Finance/Banking with an MBA (with a short stop in technology) all male dominated fields. About the “Geek”/anti social comment in your MSNBC article - some of the most social years of my life were spent with “Geeks”. I was BLESSED to be brought up by a WOMAN who graduated from MEDICAL school in 1955 (BTW - my grandfather suggested that she pursue pharmaceuticals instead because it would be less demanding)!!!! There are no stereotypes in my home! I always loved numbers - in any form! My favorite subject in college was Matrix Algebra! I probably would have pursued a degree in Computer Science but the card punch machine scared me (does anyone remember those?). Don’t get me started on the teaching profession!!! You don’t realize how important a good teacher is until you have had a bad one (sort of like a doctor). HOWEVER, please please please take into consideration that most teachers do not work FULL TIME!!!! Please calculate the number of hours they put in (yeah sure - include grading papers on Saturday nights) and then pro-rate their salaries. They are SCHOOL teachers which means they follow the same hours as our children (including snow days). One other thing - don’t forget the retirement/pension packages they get as state employees!!!! One last comment about wanting our children to be “happy”. Yeah sure that is the end goal but it would be nice - as parents - to help them find a profession which utilizes their natural strengths, even if that means a girl in computer technology (I recently heard from an old FEMALE collegue who was a PROGRAMMER in the late 80’s and 90’s who now is RETIRED and living 15 minutes from the beach in Australia- she is in her 40s - I think she found happiness). Love you Eve - when are you going to be in NY?
February 25th, 2010 at 3:55 pm
OK, it’s stop bashing on teachers time. Where’s the vitriol for the Wall Street execs who are having a big old party while working stiffs suffer?
Heard all these arguments before — there are some bad teachers, there are some under-performing schools, teachers don’t work full time.
Let’s give teachers and educators the high perch they deserve folks.
They are trying hard to teach our snotty nosed kids in a system that’s skewed against them, both financially and in terms of respect from society.
Like it or not, they’re shaping our kids’ futures and in turn all our futures.
One of these “lazy-ass teachers” is teaching a future president right now. If teachers were giving more props maybe we’d have fewer morons in politics.
February 25th, 2010 at 8:10 pm
I gave up “bad words” for Lent so I’ll just say $*(%(&)$. . . . Some HARD WORKING parent is teaching a future president!!! The BUCK STOPS HERE! What ever happened to the “village”????