The Occupational Safety and Health Administration just can’t seem to adopt new safety regulations to protect workers that deal with hazardous dust and people could die as a result.

In March, 13 workers died at Imperial Sugar Co.’s plant in Port Wentworth, Ga.

This tragedy could have been avoided.

An executive with Imperial testified yesterday before the Senate that he had found “shocking” and “disgraceful” conditions at the facility and warned his superiors that a fatal disaster was likely, according the the Associated Press.

What did his bosses do?

The AP went on to report:

Imperial Sugar Co. executives responded that he was being overzealous and told him to back off, he said. A month later, an explosion ripped through the plant in Port Wentworth, Ga., killing 13 workers and injuring dozens more.

“It was without a doubt the dirtiest and most dangerous manufacturing plant I had ever come to,” said Graham H. Graham, who toured the facility shortly after being hired in November as Imperial’s vice president of operations. “I stated that I believed a fatal disaster would befall the refinery if a fundamental change in the way the plant was operated did not take place.”

The alleged lack of good conscious on the part of these executives may have contributed to the death, but OSHA must also take some of the blame.

Independent federal safety officials in 2006 had urged the government’s main arm protecting worker safety, OSHA, to adopt new standards to protect workers against deadly dust explosions, like the one at Imperial.

But, unfortunately, those new regulations were never adopted. The federal group that urged OSHA to adopt those standards is called the Chemical Safety Board. The Board had been concerned about similar explosions caused by dust at other facilities and in 2003 investigated three horrific cases.

So what’s up OSHA?

According to the AP:

Democrats say the blast — the latest in a series of fatal dust accidents in recent years — highlights the need for new federal safety regulations. The House passed legislation in April that would force OSHA to adopt new standards specifically targeting dust hazards.

But OSHA head Edwin Foulke told the panel that the Imperial findings bolster the Bush administration’s position that regulations aren’t necessarily the cure. Although OSHA has not ruled out a new standard, he said, the investigation shows that existing regulations are broad enough to cover dust hazards.

“It shows … that the system works,” he said. “It wouldn’t have mattered if we had a combustible dust standard. This accident would have happened”

Am I missing something? Why wouldn’t the agency, given to mandate to protect worker safety, not adopt the new standards pronto?

OSHA has fined Imperial $9 million dollars, a fine that will be one of the highest ever imposed on a company.

The nearly $900 million Imperial will likely be able to absorb the fine.

But alas there are 13 families that will never be able to absorb their loss.

I can’t really finish that joke. Not in today’s uptight environment.

Heaven forbid I tell any joke, or laugh at a cartoon. (Yes, I did laugh when I got my last New Yorker with the Obamas on the cover. So sue me.)

We’re just too wound up today to tap into our humor vortex and it sucks for all of you grinding away in factories and offices, and especially those of you working outside this summer. We all need to laugh, especially in this economic environment. Lots of our great comedians came out of the Great Depression, the Marx brothers and Jack Benny. (Yes, Jack Benny. If you Gen Whatevers don’t know who the heck he is check out this YouTube video. This is what people thought was funny many moons ago.)

My column this week on MSNBC.com addresses the prevailing no-laugh zone in today’s workplaces.

I’ve already gotten tons of responses on the story, most of it from employees craving a more lighthearted 9 to 5.

I quoted Joel Goodman, director, The HUMOR Project, and he got lots of emails after my column came out.

One letter came from a reader who’s looking for a job. She took the initiative to use my column as a job-query ice breaker.

Here’s what she wrote Goodman:

“It’s so great to know that an organization like yours exists! In so many workplaces, there is such a huge need for humor. I’d LOVE to work in a fun workplace! I’d love to laugh at work! Surely there are many others thinking the same thing. Maybe I can help you carry your mission forward….”

I emailed Goodman to find out if he was even looking for workers.

I think this is a great example of being creative and pushy when it comes to your job search.

Take a lesson from this. Just sending your resumes into a technological bit box after researching jobs on Monster.com isn’t enough to make you stand out. Use any excuse to connect with a company.

In this case the excuse was humor. For you the excuse to connect might be an interesting project you know a company you’ve read about is working on, or you learned via LinkedIn or Facebook that a CEO has become a board member of a non profit you contribute to. Find an excuse, any excuse.

And, above all else, keep your humor people.

At one point in my career I got so many rejection letters that I joked about wallpapering my cramped Manhattan apartment I shared with a roommate with the paper repudiations. It was a tough time for me but my roomie and I decided to throw a potluck party, equipped with some gags such as roaches in ice and a whoopie cushion.

Did it help my mood? Damn right it did!

So, a rabbi, a priest and an imam walk into a bar and ask the bartender for directions to the nearest brothel. The bartender, a bit perplexed, couldn’t help himself and asked why these religious individuals wanted directions to a whore house.

Why? They all asked him.

OK. Now I want all of you to finish this joke for me. Tap into your funny bone and help me out here.

I’ve written a lot about how there’s little privacy in the work place when it comes to your email. I’m not a big fan of employers reading their workers’ personal information but it’s become a fact of life, especially if your boss is looking to fire you and needs a reason.

I didn’t think I’d have to also write about workers snooping on other workers, but it seems I must.

Last week, it was revealed that a well known Philadelphia news anchor, Larry Mendte, was spying on his co-anchor Alycia Lane, and he now faces criminal charges.

This guy allegedly hacked into her email over 500 times and passed along the dirt he dug up to a newspaper reporter who wrote stories about Lane.

This from the Philadelphia Inquirer:

Apparently, Mendte never thought he would get caught.

But he has not appeared on air since May 29 when FBI Agents Brian Herrick and Jason Stroud seized his computers and found e-mails from Lane’s Yahoo! account, one from March 2006 and two from June 2006.

Lane’s sexy bikini-clad photos on a beach, one of which appeared on Page 6 of the New York Post, were also found on Mendte’s computer. Lane originally e-mailed a photo to a friend.

Asked if Mendte sent the bikini photos to the New York Post, Assistant U.S. Attorney Michael Levy said, “I don’t know if he sent them. They were on his computer. I would argue that [they were sent to the newspaper] at trial.”

Mendte used computers at his Chestnut Hill home, his vacation home and his office at KYW, as well as a Union League computer once, to access Lane’s personal e-mail accounts at Apple Computer and Yahoo!, according to the information.

In a recent lawsuit against KYW, Lane contended that Mendte was “obsessively jealous” of her since 2004, especially after learning she earned about $800,000 a year, more money than he.

Mendte was fired from CBS3 on June 23, after co-anchoring the news with Lane at 6 p.m. and 11 p.m. from September 2003 until Lane was dismissed.

While an employer can pretty much go through all your email folks, workers don’t have that right in the workplace. Just because you can look over the shoulder of your coworker and see what they’re writing about on their computer, or some how you obtain their password, my advice is, keep your roving eyes to yourself.

If you’re trying to get dirt on someone so you can further your own career, that will probably land you on the unemployment line, or even up on criminal charges if you’re caught. Not to mention the fact that it’s highly unethical.

I know, it’s hard not to jump into the gossip pool, and what better way than getting some personal juicy tidbits on a coworker thank reading their email, but resist this urge, please.

It’s wrong to dig through your coworker’s desk when no one’s around, and it’s wrong, and illegal, to dig through their computer files and email.

Why would a successful newsman like Mendte do such a thing? I’m still scratching my head.

Professor Randy Pausch died today at age 47.

Didn’t see his famous YouTube video of his lecture on achieving your dreams? He did the lecture a month after he found out he was dying of cancer.

It’s inspiring. It probably will motivate you to reach for your dreams, or at least enjoy the ride more.

If you’re at work, beware, you may cry a bit. I did.

Here it is:

There’s an ongoing debate in the country over whether we need government to intervene sometimes in order to keep the nation’s businesses from screwing workers.

A debate over this was even sparked yesterday on this blog when I talked about the increase in minimum wage.

Well folks, unfortunately, we can’t rely on the business world to police itself. Money is involved. When that happens, men and women sometimes don’t do the right thing, and sometimes it’s more than a worker’s wallet that suffers. Sometimes it means death.

Yesterday the U.S. Department of Labor’s Mine Safety and Health Administration, or MSHA fined the operator of the Crandall Canyon Mine in Emery County, Utah, to the tune of $1.85 million for “violations that directly contributed to the deaths of six miners last year.”

Do you all remember the Crandall Canyon mine collapse. Not only did those six miners perish, but two mine employees and an inspector from the MSHA also died when they went in to help the men.

It was a tragic story and the CEO, Robert E. Murray, of the mine kept insisting it may have been an earthquake that led to the tragedy. I wrote about it a few times since then.

Turns out someone should have been policing Murray.

Crandall is operated by Genwal Resources Inc., which is owned by Murray Energy Corp.

This from the MSHA statement:

“MSHA’s investigation found that Genwal Resources recklessly failed to immediately report three previous coal outbursts that had occurred, two in March 2007 and one just three days before the August 6th accident,” said Richard E. Stickler, acting assistant secretary of labor for MSHA. “These reporting failures were critical, because they deprived MSHA of the information it needed to properly assess the operator’s mining plans. MSHA also found that the operator was taking more coal than allowed from the barrier pillars and the floor. This dangerously weakened the strength of the roof support.”

Here’s how the agency claims the company screwed up:

– The mine operator did not immediately contact MSHA after coal outbursts threw coal into the mine openings and disrupted regular mining activities for more than one hour on three separate occasions prior to the August 6 outburst.
The mine operator failed to propose revisions to the roof control plan when conditions (coal outbursts) clearly indicated that the plan was inadequate and miners were being exposed to dangerous conditions.
– The operator violated the approved roof control plan by removing coal that was required to support the roof.
The operator’s outside engineering firm failed to recommend safe mining methods and pillar/barrier dimensions, and the operator failed to maintain pillar dimensions that would effectively control coal outbursts.

Unfortunately, this is not an unfamiliar story.

Recently I wrote about the dramatic rise in cell tower climber deaths and how many speculated a rush to build out the cell system in the United States may have attributed to their deaths.

And a Wall Street Journal story today uncovers a huge jump in deaths in the steel industry and many believe pressure to meet exploding demand for steel may be the culprit.

We all hope that people do the right thing and not allow the greed factor to impact their decision making, especially when those decisions could hurt the very employees that are a big reason for their economic gains. But alas, hope is not enough.

Today, the nation’s minimum wage climbs 70 cents.

Yesterday, I bought a chicken and it cost me $2 more than just a few months ago. Bread is up $1, milk is up about 60 cents, and every time I buy fruit or vegetables I go into shock when the cashier rings them up. I’m not even going to get into how much more we pay at the pump.

What does this mean — it means with inflation skyrocketing the measly 70 cent hike to minimum wage for nearly 2 million workers is not only just a drop in the bucket, but a big nose-thumb to those poor souls who only get paid the minimum.

The new minimum is less than the inflation-adjusted 1997 level of $7.02, and far below the inflation-adjusted level of $10.06 from 40 years ago, according to a Labor Department inflation calculator.

And when I say poor folks, I mean poor. The increase in the minimum wage is the second of three increases that were part of a law passed in 2007, and with the recent hike to total per hour is $6.55 cents. That means $13,624 a year if the worker never takes any time off, and that means a family of four living on that wage would still be under the poverty line.

There wasn’t much hoopla over the increase today. I couldn’t even find mention of it in the three newspapers I read every morning. I’m having my intern Katherine check now to make sure I didn’t miss it.

I don’t blame the mass media for not covering it much. It’s an embarrassment that during the last decade when Wall Street bestowed unfathomable riches on so many; and the gap between the working stiff and the elite in this country reached historic proportions, that Congress would pony up only a few cents for the people at the lowest rung of the economic ladder.

I have to say, I’m surprised there hasn’t been more of an outcry from liberals or the religious right.

Poverty in the richest country in the world is a slam to equal opportunity, no?

Poverty in the richest country in the world is a sin, no?

I know I’m heading into some sticky terrain with this, but lately I’ve been wondering if indeed women wouldn’t be better off if they had something equivalent to a “Red Tent” during those premenstrual days.

Many professional women I talk to say it’s definitely harder for them to be productive right before their periods, and so many men tend to blame a woman’s bad mood and other negative behaviors on her period.

I was joking around with a friend of mine recently that women should be given a day off each month to deal with PMS.

I was only kidding folks. For the most part, women are very productive even if they have PMS. Yes, women can run companies and even this nation during this time. I just want to make that clear. Many women believe we shouldn’t even be discussing this as a problem publicly because it’s one of many reasons women still don’t get respect in the workplace. What are your thoughts on this? Just suggesting that I wanted to write this blog post made many of my female colleagues uncomfortable.

But there is something to PMS impacting our work lives. The questions are — Is it real or perceived? How bad can it get?

I asked PMS expert Diana Taylor for her take.

Taylor is professor emerita at the School of Nursing at the University of California, San Francisco, and she’s also the author of “Taking Back the Month: A Personalized Solution for Managing PMS and Enhancing Your Health.”

“Not everything can be attributed to PMS…stress plays a major role in work-related problems. However, our stress response can be accelerated during the “premenstrual days,” she says.

It’s hard to know which came first, the chicken or the egg when it comes to PMS.

“In one study, about 15 percent of the women reported that relationship problems at work—such as increased conflicts, criticism, complaints, and rejection—increased the severity of their PMS. These findings were confirmed in my own research. It’s not just the communication problems with individual coworkers that are stressful to women with PMS. Often, the overall work environment can place an added strain on women during the premenstrual phase. Women with PMS often report being more sensitive to noise, temperature changes, odors, and non-verbal tension among coworkers or work groups. Conflicting demands from various managers or supervisors or a lack of control over how the work is performed can also be especially tough to take premenstrually. Not surprisingly, women often report increased stress due to excessive workloads or insufficient time to complete their work during this already difficult time in their menstrual cycles.”

So is it all in our heads, I asked her.

“There does seem to be some evidence for what we call the expectation-experience link which can create a perpetuating cycle: While women may come to expect premenstrual symptoms for a variety of reasons, their actual experience of symptoms can also come to influence their expectations. In other words, women who have premenstrual symptoms may come to anticipate their arrival each month and, hence, may perceive events around the time of menstruation as more stressful. And this heightened perception of stress may wind up exacerbating their symptoms and so on.”

She believes we need start thinking of women’s cycles in a much more positive light, and in turn that may diminish some of the negative feelings we associate with PMS. But good luck with that one. I think many of us women have gotten used to bitching about that time of the month. No?

If there is something to the claims that PMS does indeed impact our lives/work, what can be done about it on the part of women, employers?

“Women can read my book and incorporate the remedies which include easy to integrate strategies into busy lives. As for employers, both men and women workers would benefit from stress management strategies. At least the menstrual cycle is predictable…men don’t have the same predictable period of stress vulnerability. For women, tracking their stressful days whether it be premenstrual or on the weekend when they have additional domestic burdens. Rather than focusing only on the women, employers would be better off using some to the cognitive-behavioral stress reduction strategies for all their workers (and themselves).”

And what about a day off?

“Some women may want to disappear into the modern version of the ‘menstrual hut’ each month,” she explains. But, if you can’t build that hut, she adds, women can help themselves by managing their time better and anticipating the worst of PMS. And that means avoiding or postponing stressful events.

Oh, if it were only that easy.

When I was pregnant with my daughter many years ago, I was working for the worse boss I had ever had. He was vindictive, passive aggressive, and afraid of his own shadow — all the key characteristics you don’t want in a boss.

I loved what I was doing, but this guy made my life hell. Many nights were lost to bitching about this manager and at some point my husband and I decided I needed to make a change.

My ultimate goal had always been to write a book or two, and try my hand at freelancing and becoming my own boss, but it was always not the right time to take the plunge. Well, we decided to save my whole paycheck for the nine months I was pregnant and then consider whether I could actually start life as a freelancer once my daughter was born. The jerky boss was a great motivator for finally pushing my fears aside.

We ended up saving enough money that after my six-week maternity leave I made the happy walk into my boss’ office.

I told him I was not coming back to my job because I wanted to become a freelancer and take time to write my first book.

His response: “oh, I know, once women become moms the pull of the child is just too strong.”

I tried to reiterate that I was quitting to embark on a new career path for myself, but he kept doing the wink and nod, as if I was just kidding about my new direction.

I sat there thinking, should I tell this guy — “you’re a prick. That’s why I’m out of here bozo”?

But I restrained myself, opting to do the right thing for the sake of my future in journalism and for the sake of our civil society.

Women do not leave a job they love, that pays them a good wage and fulfills them just because the call of motherhood is tugging at them. I don’t care what Dr. Laura says.

They leave because they don’t like their job, or because their bosses suck, or because the opportunities suck, or because the pay sucks.

The latter, it turns out, is one of the biggest reasons, according to a new study to be released today.

The New York Times broke the story this morning about a Congressional study and research by economists that shows women are leaving the workplace in higher numbers because of the tough economy and it’s not for the reasons everyone has assumed.

Indeed, for the first time since the women’s movement came to life, an economic recovery has come and gone, and the percentage of women at work has fallen, not risen, the Bureau of Labor Statistics reports. Each of the seven previous recoveries since 1960 ended with a greater percentage of women at work than when it began.

When economists first started noticing this trend two or three years ago, many suggested that the pullback from paid employment was a matter of the women themselves deciding to stay home — to raise children or because their husbands were doing well or because, more than men, they felt committed to running their households.

It’s the money stupid.

After moving into virtually every occupation, women are being afflicted on a large scale by the same troubles as men: downturns, layoffs, outsourcing, stagnant wages or the discouraging prospect of an outright pay cut. And they are responding as men have, by dropping out or disappearing for a while.

“When we saw women starting to drop out in the early part of this decade, we thought it was the motherhood movement, women staying home to raise their kids,” Heather Boushey, a senior economist at the Joint Economic Committee of Congress, which did the Congressional study, said in an interview. “We did not think it was the economy, but when we looked into it, we realized that it was.”

I have long talked about how a good job, with bosses who are understanding of family issues, with opportunities for advancement, and that pays a fair wage, are the kinds of jobs most people don’t just check out of. You don’t need an HR experts to explain why there is low turnover in gigs like this.

Women are done a disservice if we all just assume they are leaving the workplace because they have a child. It’s clearly not the case for most women. Saying it diminishes the importance of changing the major negatives in today’s workplace — a growing disparity in pay among the rank and file and top executives, and the inflexibility when it comes to work-life balance.

And the occasional pricky boss of course.

There I was taking a hot yoga class when our instructor starts talking about the benefits of yoga. It was 6 a.m., and the instructor probably wasn’t totally awake. He said, “the practice of yoga helps your e-ternal organs.” He quickly corrected himself, saying he meant, “internal organs,” but I found myself laughing out loud at his faux pas.

You see, I’ve been working on a story for Business Week’s SmallBiz magazine about virtual worlds, and one of the key parts to the story are avatars, those cartoon depictions people create of themselves when they want to go into one of these virtual worlds.

When the instructor said “e-ternal” I pictured myself as my own avatar doing yoga with my e-ternal organs glowing or something. I laughed so much the other students were looking at me funny, so I felt compelled to tell the instructor after the class what got me going.

When I mentioned an avatar he looked at me like I had six heads. “What’s that?” he asked.

I went on to explain, a bit shocked that this sort-of-hip yoga guru had no idea what an avatar was.

I realized right then that we’re at a technological cross roads, a big one. Things are happening so fast, no one can really keep up with it all.

Avatars, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you’re not up on all this stuff you really need to start educating yourself.

I’m telling you folks, the work world is being transformed over and over again by technology day in and day out.

Even my own world of journalism has been altered beyond recognition in just a decade. Almost all the newspapers in the United States are firing workers as ad revenues for paper newspapers plummet; and almost every publication has a web presence. I surely could never have predicted this when I was working for a newspaper in Tampa, Florida, less than ten years ago when a weird, young editorial assistant sitting next to me was spending all his time writing about his love life on this new thing called a blog. And, I can’t believe I had no iPhone, no laptop. I was a tech dope.

Recently, my intern Katherine became a tech tutor to her mother, who is reentering the Corporate workforce after years of staying home with her kids.

It’s an odd situation to have your child teach you something, so I’m proud of Katherine’s mom for putting aside her ego and taping into her kid’s brain to help her own career.

Here’s Katherine’s take on how it went:

It’s 2pm on a Wednesday, the day before my mother starts her new job, and I, the child, am trying to teach her, the parent, about computers.

It’s been at least eight years since she has stepped foot into the corporate world, so we just want to make sure she is familiar with a few basics before she goes to work.

It’s not that she has never used a computer before (quite the opposite actually, she uses one every day). However, she only uses the computer for two things: to access the internet and to write.

In fact, to her, the computer is “a fancy typewriter.” It’s just “one that doesn’t need whiteout,” she says.

Since she doesn’t really use programs other than Microsoft Word, we’re going over things like Excel and PowerPoint. I guess you could say that I’m broadening her horizons.

Instead of jumping into the programs first, we end up browsing the web and land on social networking sites like Facebook, MySpace and LinkedIn. I’m fairly certain she knew about these already, but now she has a more intimate knowledge of them.

After the social networking sites, we somehow end up on YouTube.com looking at a Gatorade ad. We also talk about hyperlinks and embedding things.

I feel that this is at least semi-relevant seeing as she is in the marketing and communications arena. Admittedly, the search for my brother on YouTube.com was not so relevant.

We finally get to Excel and PowerPoint, but have to get through them quickly.

First we go into Excel, where we make a table with bogus data and I demonstrate how to put formulas in place.

Surprisingly, we finish the tables, the formulas and the charts without a problem. We even put the charts on different sheets and give each a special name.

Just when I think it’s going well, she says “what about making the cells wider or narrower?” The word “seriously” may have escaped my lips.

I keep forgetting that she did not grow up with computers like I did.

After we go over the basic things I skipped, she seems less intimidated by Excel. I wouldn’t go as far as to say she is comfortable with it yet, but she’s getting there.

PowerPoint goes much quicker and simpler. We basically just discuss how to insert a new slide and format each one differently.

I know we are done when she says that she’ll figure out the rest if necessary.

Even though we didn’t get to touch on Publisher or other things, I think, or at least I hope, the poorly-taught tutoring session helped.

Now, if I can get her to stop calling a laptop a portable, then we’ll really be on the right track.

A portable. Remember calling it that? You know, I have no problem with her mom calling it a portable or an electronic box for that matter. At least she’s trying to learn what she can to keep up with it all.

Everyday we’ll learn new things. My column this week on MSNBC.com is about all these social networking sites and how the heck to figure out which one you need to be part of to further your career. I even learned a lot doing the piece. I learned a lot of this stuff is crap, but a lot of it isn’t.

That’s a scary proposition. What if you miss out on the important stuff and get mired in the crap?

But that’s sort of how life works. Every day we have to reassess what’s working for us and what’s not. That’s not a bad thing, right? Let’s look at it as an adventure, and also reach out for help to anyone we think can help — our daughters, our friends, our spouses, and me. Send me email anytime at telleve@gmail.com, and if I can’t answer your question I’ll find someone who can. You may even teach me something.

I’m sure, even in cyberspace, a digital Lewis and Clark expedition would still need a Sacagawea avatar.

So there I was sitting with two happy couples for a taping of the the Donny Deutsch show, “The Big Idea”, on CNBC that airs tonight.

I mention that these couples are happy because it’s surprising that they are.

Why? They’re not only married, they are also business partners. I know what you’re thinking - because everyone thinks this – how the hell are they able to be partners in love and in business?

Well, these entrepreneurs are the oddballs. And I said that on the show. (Yes, I’ll be on the show tonight; that is, if the editors don’t cut me out. Which is possible, so don’t be disappointed if you stay up until 10 p.m.. EST and CareerDiva isn’t there.)

I was on the show to offer my counter view to their success.

Maybe some of you couples out are considering going into business with your spouse because the economy is tough right now and you may end up on the corporate trash heap. But think long and hard folks before you share your bed and your company with one person.

Here are the five things that can go wrong:
1. Marriage and business both go belly up. You could end up losing your marriage and business because many marriages just can’t take major financial upheaval, which is what happens when starting any business.
2. Kiss romance goodbye. Many couples say they get sick of being together day in and day out. Even the most lovie-dovie couples need some time alone in order to keep the passion burning.
3. Dining room becomes the boardroom. The lines between homelife and worklife are blurred. There is no way around it, you’re going to be bringing your company woes home with you and vice versa. Right now, when I’m bitching too much about my business, my husband slaps me around and reminds me I need a personal life. Who will be there to slap you around if your partner is also bitching about the same company?
4. “I can’t believe you said that.” Talk about hurt feelings! Try telling your spouse they screwed up, or made a wrong business decision.
5. Battle of the sexes. If you never resolved the who’s-the-boss issue at home get ready for all out war at work. One of the reasons my mom and dad couldn’t make a go of running a business together was because my father saw himself as the king of his household, and that translated into him being the king of the business, even when my mom had good ideas because she really was the one who understood the retail business they started. Now my mother’s advice is always, “never with your husband.”

If you watch the show tonight you’ll hear some of how the couples that made a go at partnership made it work. They were the two cutest couples, totally friends, lovers and great business partners. Cricket and Brian Allen, the owners of Bot, a fortified water business. And Sandra and Kym Yancey, owners of eWomen Network, a national networking website.

But again, these are the oddballs.

Here’s a good example of why Cricket and Brian are successful at melding love and company:

I was in the Green room waiting to go on the show, and just before we went into the studio Cricket turned to Brian and said, “did you eat your sandwich?” He turned to her with a genuine smile on his face and yes, “yes, I did.” He was so grateful his wife was thinking of him.

OK, if I did that to my husband, this would be his response: “I’m not Cheiron.” Cheiron is my six-year-old son.

Do you see my point? If not, I will explain it to you. When two partners work together to make a business grow they have to say mean things, critical things to each other often. They can’t take things personally and they have to look at the criticism or advice as constructive and for the good of the business.

Most couples get emotional with each other. That’s not a bad thing. It’s just reality.

You have to leave you emotions and the constant business talk at the company door, don’t take it to work and don’t replay it at home.

Can you do that with your spouse? When’s the last time you guys had an argument? What was it about? Imagine now that you were really angry at your spouse but when the alarm went off in the morning you had to head to an office or factory together and focus on working together in harmony all day.

If this doesn’t worry you, go ahead. Start a mom and pop. I dare you.